Friday, March 27, 2009


Hello, loyal readers! You probably thought I would abandon you during the off-season. Well, shows what you know! There have been a few events in recent times that merit my discussion, namely Florida doing something laughable and BSU releasing their out of conference schedule. I could touch on minor events, like Andre Smith being probably the dumbest player alive (who in the hell leaves the scouting combine early, especially after you weren’t allowed to play in a bowl game?). But, I don’t feel like it. So, enjoy this abbreviated version of my NCAA reviews!

-So, remember when Florida lost to Ole Miss? If you don’t (and you shouldn’t feel bad if you don’t, because remember that Tim Tebow makes you a better person just by being near him), allow me to refresh your memory. Down by one, Florida ran a QB keeper with little time left on 4th and 1, which Ole Miss stopped, thereby ensuring that Florida would not have a perfect season. After the game, Tebow gave an incredibly weepy speech (seriously, he was crying), where he said that nobody will play harder, or do more, than Florida that season. Now, I have no issues with that speech. That’s a great thing to do after you get beat by a team that you have no business losing to, plus, it clearly worked.

So, what do I have an issue with? Florida has decided to put this speech on a plaque and hang it on the campus. Right now. Not after he graduates. Now. Does that seem a little excessive to everybody else? Hopefully, Tebow will actually live up to the lofty expectations set by every single person in the nation, and show a little humility in this matter by requesting they take it down. They can put it up after he leaves, I (and much of the football watching nation, even Florida fans) would have no problem with that. But leaving it up while he is still there? I mean sure, we all know he is, by far, the most important part of their team. But to outright let every single other player on the team be reminded of that every second they are on campus? Not the best of ideas.

-So, BSU’s OOC schedule came out today. Featuring the powerhouse Oregon being the home opener, the schedule does lack something.


UC Davis? Miami of Ohio? Bowling Green? Tulsa? Not to mention the fact that the WAC is the second weakest conference in the nation (and if the Sun Belt can have a team almost beat LSU, this is in question).

Seriously, BSU better pray to the BCS gods that they beat Oregon. Because if they don’t, the chance they have of making a BCS Bowl next season is up there with me caring about Dancing with the Stars. Almost zero (I can’t help it if Shawn Johnson is a smoking hottie).

This affords me the opportunity to bring up another point that I made in one of my rants last season. A non-BCS team should, under no circumstances, make a BCS bowl if their schedule includes any team from a lower division. Originally, I said a non-BCS team for OOC, but I realized that was both harsh and reduces the chance of Utah/BYU beating BSU in a few years.
When you think about it, it makes sense. On one hand, you have USC, who was the only team to play only BCS opponents in every single game. They lose one game, to a very good Oregon State team who came within a field goal of going 11-2 (don’t forget their “exciting” win over Pitt in the Boring Bowl!). The big win in their OOC scheduling would be Ohio State (which, if going by scoring, should have accounted for somewhere in the neighborhood of tens wins). They also beat the entireity of the Pac-10 save Oregon State, which, for being a conference on a “down” year, did a tremendous job of winning all of their bowl games. On the other hand, you have a BSU team with a decent win over an injured Oregon team (not to mention one of the worst cheap shots I have ever seen on a quarterback, and if you don’t agree with this you literally have no soul), and absolutely nothing else.

Granted, it isn’t BSU’s fault that the WAC is pathetic. Certainly, they are doing nothing wrong with winning by thirty plus points (they are doing something wrong with acting like it is impressive). But, let’s say that Oregon State beat Oregon (and, for ease of discussion purposes, Utah as well). Who is more deserving of an at-large bid to a major game? USC, who had one bad half all season and slaughtered the rest of the good to excellent competition? Or BSU, who went undefeated through a schedule that most high schools in Texas and California could have sleepwalked through?

My point is, BSU (and any other mid-major with insulting schedules like this) are only hurting themselves in the long run. It may provide an easy way to a BCS bowl the next couple seasons, but eventually, pollsters are going to realize that a bulldozer beating a field of tulips isn’t that impressive, even if the tulips couldn’t make a dent in the bulldozer.

-Did KTVB really think they were fooling anybody when they announced that BSU signed the “number one quarterback from California”? He signed with USC. I can’t remember his name, or high school. I just remember that he signed with USC (whenever they get a good player, the rest of the internet whines with the fury of a thousand suns).
-Ian Johnson and the draft: Possible late second day pick, more probably sign with someone after the draft. Goes on to a mostly unspectacular, but incredibly solid career. This is not an insult. 99.9% of the NFL doesn’t have a spectacular career. Lots of them don’t even have a solid one.
-Jeremy Childs and the draft: If he gets drafted I will actually buy a BSU shirt and wear it for a day. If he makes a team, actually makes one and doesn’t just sign up for one then get cut during the middle of the summer (also known as pulling a Zabransky), I will be very surprised.

Way too Early pre-season predictions:
-National championship: Texas-Florida (Florida wins)
-Rose Bowl: USC-Ohio State/Penn State/Iowa. No, not one of those. All three at once. It is the only way to keep the Big Ten in that game.
-Idaho will win 4 games.
-Tebow will be caught with a hooker mid-coitus. He will say that he was merely talking Christianity with her. Every sportscaster will believe him.
-The game that USC loses, preventing them from going to the national title game even though it won’t be a bad loss and both Texas and Florida will have a worse loss: Oregon.
-My liver status by season’s end: barely functioning.
-BCS “Buster”- Nobody. All the mid-majors either defeat themselves (in the case of Utah/BYU/TCU cannibalizing each other) or lose their one marquee game (BSU beaten by Oregon).
-I will update next: probably with the draft.