Thursday, December 10, 2009

BCS- Bull Champion Shit News and Notes

Hello sports fans, and welcome to yet another edition of my news and notes. Let me start with some bad news. The photo journal promised last week will not go up until next week sometime, as real life concerns have taken most of my time this week. But, on to the good news! You still get a healthy dose of the content you have come to know and love from me, the AngryFootballNerd! This edition sees an anti-BCS rant, as well as predictions for the BCS bowls, and a select other bowl game (like it isn't the Humanitarian Bowl...). So, without wasting any more of your valuable time, here we go!

-So, the SEC championship game. How awesome was it when Tim Tebow was in tears at the end of the game? SO AWESOME. Also, kudos to Nick Saban for being a much better person than his counterpart for Florida would have been were he up that much with the ball at the end of the game. Of course Dickweed Meyer would have kept going, because he is a tool. Anyway, thank you, Florida, for showing us that this emperor was, in fact, wholly without clothes. Gee, guess it turns out that the SEC East wasn't all that strong, if Florida's level of play against the only decent opponent all season is any indication...

-So, Texas should have lost to Nebraska. I'm just saying, when you are totally outplayed like that, you deserve to lose. I give credit for their win to the timekeeper, who, if it were literally ANY other game this entire season (except involving a potential Florida loss) would have let that last second expire and let it stand during review. But come one, we can't have even a chance that the BCS could actually pit the two best teams against each other in the Championship! TCU vs. Alabama would be a most exciting game. Alabama vs. Texas... well, just wait until my predictions.

-Regarding the BCS bowl selection: Hey douchebags, way to give undefeated TCU a shot against a team they beat last year when they look like they could beat literally any college team this year (as well as the Raiders and Cheifs). You know an organization is fucked up when all it can do to try to save face is run a twitter (@InsidetheBCS, follow it for a laugh) that updates up to three times every two weeks with pro-BCS articles (ones that usually show absolute worst case scenarios of playoffs, none of which compares to a single season's issues with the BCS).

Here is a list of sports that use a play-off to determine their champion:


Let me cut this short before my blood pressure sets a new world record. The BCS system this year has promised us AT LEAST TWO UNDEFEATED TEAMS AT THE END OF THE SEASON, with the possibility for three if Cincy beats Florida. How is that, in any way, acceptable?

Anyway, here are my predictions for the BCS games in no particular order:

Sugar Bowl: On one hand, a coach headed to Notre Dame. On the other hand, a team that has had its legacy so vastly overinflated you could easily power the entire planet with the air force generated from people talking about Tebow (who, by the way, if he wins the Heisman this weekend has single-handedly made that award pointless). Both teams have alternated between looking really good and looking poor, with the only difference being that the games Cincinnati has looked poor in have been against better competition than the Gators. 31-17 Bearcats, but could easily be Gators

Orange Bowl: First off, raise your hand if you give a shit about this game.

Wait, what are all these crickets doing in here? Shoo, shoo!

Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh yeah

Rose Bowl: Oregon is a damn good team that likes to score early and often. Ohio State was beaten by the sixth place Pac-10 team at home. 70-14 (the two OSU touchdowns in the last five minutes, with TRESSELBALL demanding no attempts at two point conversions or other such flashy nonsense) Oregon.

Fiesta Bowl: Two undefeated mid-majors. One of whom has looked incredibly impressive against everybody, another who has looked incredibly impressive against bottom 10 teams but has the benefit of being the absolute luckiest fucking team in the world. I predict a final score of 34-21, but I refuse to predict a winner. Also, my sympathies to TCU, who in a year when they have a legitimate claim to playing in the title game, are playing a team they beat last year. Smaller sympathies to BSU, who I was really looking forward to seeing poop themselves against a magical Iowa team (come on, anybody who watched Iowa this season will tell you that them being down by 28 points in the first half is absolutely not a problem).

Humanitarian Bowl: This game should be incredibly high scoring. Like, over 100 total points I think. Anyway, much to the sorrow of the chucklefuck on Caves and Prater who said he would "rather the Taliban win in Afghanistan than Idaho win a bowl game*," infinity-infinity plus 2 Idaho

National Championship: Other than the heart attack that Mack Brown has when Alabama literally kills them, this will be a fairly boring game. I also look forward to him stammering something about beating Oklahoma. 41-3 ROLL TIDE

Anyway, the photo-journal of my trip to the USC-Arizona game should be up next week, along with some "classic" reposts, including the much fabled drinking game. Also, the special "Dumbest Moments of the Season" should run sometime during bowl season, depending on when the new AngryFootballHeadquarters gets internet access. Until then, enjoy the cold as balls weather!

*You know, I hate Boise State. But I certainly don't hate it on the level of wishing that thousands of people would fucking die instead of them winning a game.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

The BCS killed my family! NCAA Week Most meaningful games are done Notes

Hello sports fans, and welcome to another edition of my NCAA news and notes. Not a ton to talk about this week, although I do have an inside report from a BSU game! So, without wasting time, let's get this started!

-USC crushed UCLA, 28-7. It could have been 21-7, but when USC knelled with 53 seconds left, Neuheisel decided to call a timeout. You know, because scoring two touchdowns in less than a minute has been UCLA's strong point this season apparently. Well, he learned that if you are going to play like that, USC will play right back, with Matt Barkley throwing a TD on the next play. Way to go Neuheisel!

-Alabama should have lost to Auburn. There, I said it. They played like ass, and needed a lengthy drive (not THE DRIVE as CBS announcers kept calling it) to come from behind to beat an unranked team at home. Seriously, if the NCG is a rematch of Florida-Alabama, I am going to kill someone. And that's without having seen the SECCG, which is this Saturday. Pray for rain people. A rain of meteors, all over that game.

-TCU could beat any team in the nation. They could. Your favorite team, or mine, or anyone's may give them a game. They may even lead for a bit. And then TCU will come back and you will lose. That's just the way it is.

-OK, obviously I'm not saying that it is impossible for them to lose. Any team can lose. However, I think that it is as close to impossible as it could be for TCU to get beaten by more than 3. This team is good, and to deny that is absurd to the point of being comical.

So, I went to the BSU-Nevada game last Friday. Here are some highlights:
-BSU fans booing the handshake between captains, Nevada time outs, false starts, and basically every single thing that wasn't a BSU touchdown.
-A guy putting a padlock on a portapottie after I took a leak in it, telling me to never come back again. Talk about cutting off your nose to spite your face...
-Four BSU students, standing in the Nevada fans section, taunting the Nevada cheerleaders (not the male cheerleaders), fans, and parents, and basically confirming every single stereotype about bad fans that is possible. Honestly, at a football game, I have a pretty high tolerance for bullshit. I get the emotions and all that; it is an important part of the game. But these guys were just morons. I don't mind taunting, but at least taunt the other team (ie: the people that matter). If you're taunting the cheerleaders, stay in your own fucking section. At least there, people might buy into your macho bullshit penis compensation act.

Speaking of BSU, there has been an awesome trend here on the campus. A couple, actually. The first is that the ASBSU representatives only send out e-mails regarding football games, not about things like, say, open meetings to discuss tuition costs. Awesome, awesome trend.

The other trend, one that I find hilarious, is to complain about the BCS as if it is some sort of multinational entity dedicated solely to fucking BSU as hard as possible. The entire student newspaper (except for the article talking about how any democrat is an evil person, which is also pretty standard) is devoted to the BCS.

The Student Council signed an Anti-BCS bill (I'm sure that's effective), saying that they don't like it.

One columnist pretended that Coach Petersen was Mack Brown of Texas, bitching at the BCS not including them this year (when, last I checked, they were almost certain to get a BCS bid).

You know what the best way, BSU, to get rid of the BCS would be? Here, I'm going to write it out for you:

1. Start playing good teams. Don't give me that "nobody will play us" bullshit, as no other team in the nation seems to have that problem. Utah busted the BCS first and better, and they don't seem to have that issue. So stop playing the "poor widdle us" card, be willing to take less then cupcake money (because, if you're as good as you claim, then it shouldn't matter), and travel to some good football schools. And if you manage to beat them, great! Now get out there and play the rest of your schedule instead of talking every week about the one game you did play.
2. Stop playing the media game. For every one person impressed by the WAC hiring media consultants for you, there are two hundred who think that's a lameass move. Let your playing on the field do the talking, even if that means telling Benson to shut the hell up (please do that one anyway, as he is helping exactly one person with his constant campaigning, and that person's name is Karl Benson).
2a. This includes having players and coaches complain in public. Petersen lost what respect I (and many others) had for him, when after beating La Tech by ten said "We'll probably drop 6 or 7 in the rankings for this." A) You were favored by 21, and B) Awfully hard to rise when the teams in front of you play better opposition and win.
3. Ban the local media from commenting on it. When BCS people hear that everyone here hates them, and they are under no obligation to take BSU, no matter how undefeated they are, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that they probably aren't going to take a team from a market that is vehemently opposed to them. This one is a weaksauce decision on the BCS's part, but nobody ever said they make sense.
4. When another team from your conference (or any non-BCS conference) makes it to a big game, cheer for them. Going all anti-Hawaii two years ago and anti-Utah last year didn't help anyone, and just proved to the BCS idiots that there is not enough of a consensus for them to worry about.

There you have it.

Next week's update will be my yearly trip to a USC game, so look forward to it!