Ohio State Loses Rose Bowl, Winner To Be Decided Later

Hello football fans, and welcome to another exciting edition of AngryFootballNerd. Somewhat of a brief update this week, as I'm busy working on something to run before bowl season. A little project I'm calling "The Dumbest Moments This Season." Before you groan, let me tell you that in my humble but accurate opinion, this shit is funny. Anyway, here's this weeks round-up of games.

-So, Stanford devastated USC. This was a surprise to the people who made the 34.5 point spread in USC's favor, and almost nobody else. A surging Stanford team against a USC team that could only win the Big 10 this year (ZING!)? Not exactly the hardest game to call.

-Of course, don't tell that to SEC fans. See, USC losing isn't because Stanford is a good team. No, it is actually a function of USC being "terrible" and all the rest of the PAC-10 being a "pathetic conference that couldn't hold a candle to any team in the SEC." This is why the South is an intellectual wasteland, people.

-So, here comes some brief coverage of the U of I-BSU game, which I am mostly using a segue into my next segment. BSU won, again, to the surprise of nobody. Just a couple of things on that: 1) If you are giving up 578 yards to Idaho, you could be royally... what is the word I'm looking for..... oh yes, royally fucked when playing Nevada; 2) That was totally a block in the back on the kick-off return TD, but it's not like getting that call right would have changed the outcome; 3) Again, while the final outcome probably wouldn't have been any different, if Enderle had been at QB, chances are the turnover count would not have been at 7 for Idaho.

-Alright, on to the fun! So, the reason that I talked about that game was to talk about Tim Woodward's "article" about tailgating and who has "better" fans (better in this case meaning not giving shit to the other team). This was spurred after the basketball game between the two up in Moscow last year, where U of I students *GASP* yelled mean things to BSU players and flipped the Bird, which is by far the most offensive thing that you can possibly do to an opponent (not saying it was right, just that things don't need to be blown out of proportion). So, his brilliant solution was to go to a U of I tailgate, wearing U of I things, and see how he would be treated. Ignoring the fact that if you are in a tailgate, you are fairly safe (strength in numbers, that whole thing), let me just boil the article down for you: "So, when it comes down to it, both teams have drunk, obnoxious fans. But I'm going to ignore the Boise State ones, because that would make my article pointless (AFN Note: As if it wasn't already?). U of I fans are doo-doo heads, and my wife saw one of them wear an insulting shirt. All the BSU fans I saw were exemplars of class. Why, I even saw one heal the broken leg of a poor Vandal, only to be rewarded with bile spit from the heathens stomach at him." Ok, I may have taken a few creative liberties with that, as everyone knows it is impossible to heal a broken leg. But the gist of the article is there.

I'm going to share a little story here. While I've never been a BSU fan, it has only been recently that I have become so vehemently against them. Here, I am going to tell you why.

During the 2006 season, BSU came up to Moscow to play. This was a good game (26-28 with 5 minutes left, so anytime after the game my BSU friends would tell me that they never doubted the outcome, I was able to accurately point out they were full of shit), that has the distinction of being marred by one horrid incident.

You see, before the game, I was chatting with a friend of mine that had recently graduated. She was in town for the game, and we were having a wonderful conversation about our lives in the time that we hadn't seen each other.

And then, a BSU fan approached us. And let loose with this little gem:

"Hey bitch, after the game, I'm going to rape you, just like the Broncos will rape your shitty team!"

So, any time a BSU fan tries to talk to me about class, you'll forgive me if it falls on deaf ears.

-Since I can't end on a downer like that... This week's title was inspired by Ohio State beating Iowa to secure a trip to the Rose Bowl. Their competitor has yet to be decided, as the PAthetiC-10 champion is not yet decided.

Anyway, tune in next week, as I will have a report on a weekend of games of very little importance, save for a few PAC-10 conference games.